For People Who Don’t Like Your Hair

People will inevitably give you a hard time about your hair. The most common being:
  • Cut your hair.
  • You look like a girl.
  • Are you some kinda hippy?
Here are some responses to keep in your back pocket.
  1. My shoulders are having a party. They're waiting for my hair to arrive.
  2. Sorry, I couldn’t hear you, I'm having a great hair day.
  3. Actually my hair is better than your girlfriend’s.
  4. You don’t look like a girl and you are one (just kidding don’t say that).
  5. I’m growing it out to donate to charity (only use this, of course if you intend to donate your hair).
  6. Would you tell Jesus to cut his hair?
  7. Short hair is easy. Anyone can have short hair. Long hair takes commitment.
  8. I can tell you’ve had thousands of consecutive bad hair days.
  9. I’m growing it out for #HairWhipWednesday.
  10. My long hair shows I don’t have to look, or live, the way anyone thinks I should.


  1. New to thelonghairs community but been growing my locks for about three years now. I’m former US Marine and now a firefighter for almost 15 years. I’ve heard all the comments from you look like a girl all the way to pony boy being in the fire service. I don’t even give them a response because I knew the comments would come and I just consider it jealousy or like you guys said I’m okay with the commitment I made even though I have to wear in a bun or in some kind of up fashion to stay within policy. Then I started thinking. What’s my end game here? Why can’t men have long hair in the fire service? Does that make a good fireman a bad fireman because he decided to have or rather make the commitment to growing and having long hair. So I decided to rewrite the policy so allow longer hair in my department and it’s in the process of being reviewed by the higher ups.
    Obviously being in the occupation that I’m in, there’s no way I’m able to wear it down even if there wasn’t a policy being that my hair is past my shoulders and still growing with a few trims every now and then. Like you guys said, Fire and hair don’t mix so I kind of have to keep it up while I’m at work which is my personal choice however if a future long hair decides to grow the locks out there hopefully won’t be a policy to stop them.
    So to all the long haired fellas out there keep fighting the good fight and never let cutting be the answer. I’ve never had another long haired man ask those dumb questions because I really do think the only ones that make the comments or ask those questions are just jealous of we are doing. The more I think about it the ones who try and make a deal about men having long hair always seem to be the bald ones………. Weird?!!!!’
    Glad I stumbled upon the long hair community on YouTube. Love what you guys are about and can’t wait for my hair bands to come it.

  2. I have had enough comments on both ends.

    At this point I couldn’t care less what people say about it. Its my hair.

  3. My comeback is that I always wanted to be a rock star, and now that I am retired,
    I am, at least, going to look like one.

  4. This has always been a source of ire with me. I grew up in the sixties when “long haired freaky people need not apply” (remember the song?) my parents chose my haircut with some bullying help from high school teachers, coaches mostly, who thought they should be the ones to choose my haircuts. After high school I joined the Navy and everyone knows how the military feels about haircuts. At the age of thirty I finally got to be the one to choose. I tried many styles, some good, many bad. I’ve had employers try to enforce their opinions on me and I never allowed that to influence me choice. Now I’m 70 and the virus made it easy to choose long hair. I love the look and blessed with some very cooperative genetics it’s growing nicely. It’s dark gray, very thick, and wavy enough that women envy it. Except my wife. She wants me to get a trim. It seems counterproductive to cut a quarter inch off when I want it to grow.

    Thanks for being a resource as I learn how to take care of it.

  5. I’m nearly 57 years old. I’ve had long hair since I was 13. My long haired uncle gave me 2 great comebacks to someone calling me a hippie.
    1) Stare them straight in the eye and say, “I’m no hippie, hippies are non-violent.” Do not break eye contact until they laugh or take a swing. I’ve never had anyone take a swing for that.
    2) In certain regions, lift the back of your hair and say, “It’s all red under there.”
    These have never failed me.

  6. I am fortunate to not get too many negative comments about my hair from friends and coworkers, I am too oblivious of strangers being haters, but my family is pretty rude about it. I often get comments like “You would look more handsome if you cut your hair.” or “Girls would like you more with short hair.” I usually tell them that opinions vary wildly from person to person. I also like to point out the long haired men that they find attractive, knowing them well helps a lot with that.

    1. Author

      Good tactic Travis. Kinda lousy to get rude feedback from your family, but so it goes. We’re with ya man, keep lettin it ride!

  7. Love these thoughts!

    I’m almost 11 months in of growing my hair, and I have gotten one or two snide comments. I also remember the Bible verses on it, which are taken out of context. Fortunately, most of the feedback I’ve heard from people has been positive. Most importantly, I like the confidence and freedom I’ve gained.

    I’m keeping those shears bound!

  8. My mom forced me to cut my hair as I was in the process of growing it for 6 months. I have very kinky curly hair and during the process, I tried everything in order to keep it neat, well kept and looking nice, but when my awkward stage hit, it was basically impossible. I ended up cutting it but I want to actually grow it out now. What advice do you have for me

    1. Just look into growing out Afro-textured hair, and I don’t see how an Afro getting taller and taller plus wider and wider would look awkward unless you were trying to style it like straight hair.

  9. I’ve had long hair for more than 30 years now, and always just tied it into a pony tail. Now recently I’m investigating into man buns and top knots, just curious how it would look on me. My hair is quite greasy, I have to wash it every 2 days, otherwise it’s just a sticky, ungly mess. Do I still need to oil it using coconut oil? Also, the longer it gets, the thinner the ends will become, so in the end, I’ll have to cut a piece off… usually ending up in having just half of my pony tail left after I went to the barber 🙁
    I just wash it every two days with Guhl shampoo which is against greasy hair, is that good stuff or should I avoid it? And to fight those flyaways I just ordered a can of super strong hair spray a friend from Norway advised me. He has a top knot with undercut and his hair looks SUPER-nice! It’s this spray:
    Joico Flip Turn Volumizing Finishing Hairspray, 9 Oz
    And of course I also have a beard 🙂
    Just washing those facial hairs with the same shampoo… OK or not?
    I posted a picture of me having a full man bun in on FB to just see what my friend would say…. only ONE of them used the “sad” emoticon, all others were positive! So, just a few (no, ONE) hater here. If you want I can post that picture here also!

  10. I’d have to say that even though it is often thought of as feminine for a man to grow out his hair, I am beginning to see more and more younger women getting really short hair cuts. That said, I think it is a matter of preference for what a person chooses as far as hair is concerned. I have always thought that longer hair, on me anyways has looked better. In regards to the Jesus comment, the Bible doesn’t actually tell us he had long hair. It is only a common thought. But if you are in church and getting negative comments about your hair isn’t that sad? I mean the Bible tells us not to judge one another. So if you are being judged in church or by one who goes to church, they haven’t been living Biblical Principals and thus are not living the word out in there own life. This is my opinion anyway.

    1. Actually, the Bible says
      “Does not nature itself teach you that if a man wears long hair it is a disgrace for him”

      I am still growing out my hair btw.

      I dont like it when people the verse “don’t judge others” to basically say “shut up”..
      when they ignore all the other verses.

      Again, I am growing out my hair btw.

      1. So, when Jesus said judge not he was telling his followers to shut up? Just curious.

  11. ”My hair is actually better than your girlfriend’s” (Died of laughter) that’s brilliant! You guys are killers!

  12. Im growing out my hair and i wanted to hear from you guys that itll look good since my hair is thin and straight 🙂

  13. Being from the Bible belt having long hair and being a guy makes you stick out alot but I have noticed that girls say more negative things then guys to which my go to response is “you’re just mad because my hair looks better than yours” FYI my hair is well below my shoulder blades and actually looks better than most girls where I live

  14. I am a 61year old retired police officer and Coast Guard veteran who was forced to cut his hair to military specs for 33 years. Now that I am retired, I feel I have earned the right to wear my hair any
    damned way I please. Thankfully, I still retain the thick, flowing locks of my youth, with very little grey.
    For those judgmental haters out there, I ask, ” how dare you?”

    1. Well said Mark! Stoked to have you on board and thanks for your many years of service. Congrats on retirement, keep lettin’ it ride!

    2. I feel you there brother! I did 8 years in the marine corps and the last two years I was in, all I could think about was how I can’t wait to grow my hair when I get out. Ive been growing it for 8 months now! Still kinda at that awkward stage but its getting there! Btw, this page is rad, good job guys.

  15. 50+ corporate world type greying longhair here, commenting for the first time… appreciate all the comments, tips and sense of community. Found this site looking for some hair ties and kept on reading. I’ve enjoyed some of the responses and will definitely use them.

    Best response I’ve given was during a business lunch with some co-workers who all view me as weird for my hair style. Waitress loved my hair and asked to touch it – of course I said yes. As she left, I looked at the guys who were all staring at me wondering what I had that they didn’t, and said, “My hair’s f—able, yours is not.”

  16. When asked why spartan men grew long hair the king said that “Long hair adds beauty to a good face, and terror to an ugly one”

  17. I’m 63 years old . I decided that ‘aging’ , as they say, brings you back to infancy, so I decided to make a ‘stop-over’ in my teens, hence, long hair, which I couldn’t, at that time. So now, it’s long, below my shoulder blades, I’m 6′ 1″ foot. And I do not care what people think, period… If, whenever I decide to cut my hair, I will contact the Canadian Cancer Society, and if my hair is acceptable, I will have it cut to their specs, and so I will have contributed…..
    I’m very happy to have found you guys, because you have nice tricks to make my hair look real cool.

    1. Author

      Yo Claude!

      Thanks for writing in sir. We’re thrilled you’ve discovered this website and that it’s helped you in your long hair journey. When and if the time comes to cut it…be sure to donate!

  18. What do I do if my parents are the ones wanting me to cut it? Any advice on how to convince them to let me continue to grow out my hair?

      1. Author

        Just saw this one, El Moreno. Literally lol’ing.

    1. Author

      Yo Jeremiah,

      This is a sensitive topic, and really deserves a full post.

      First off is being respectful to your parents under any circumstances.

      Talk to your parents about it. Ask them what bothers them about your long hair. There could be any number of reasons, but really listen to them.

      The next step is to demonstrate a high level of personal responsibility. That could mean getting good grades, doing your chores, always being on time for things, making it home before curfew, helping with responsibilities around the house, holding down a job, submitting your college applications, keeping your room clean and hundreds of other things. If you can show that you have taken ownership over your life and your responsibilities, the topic of long hair becomes secondary. Or at least it gives you a strong platform for your long hair argument.

      We advocate for men with long hair. We claim that you can be a successful businessman, working professional, family man, or anything you might want to become with long hair. The only reason we need to make that claim is because there is a pervasive stereotype that men with long hair are lazy, slackers, hippies, slugs and slack-jawed wasteoids. Unfortunately generations before us might have perpetuated that sterotype. But the only way we can break it is by actually demonstrating we’re not those things just because we have long hair.

      Clearly demonstrate a high level of responsibility, and most parents will soften up on the long hair.

      Hope this helps, amigo, keep lettin it ride.

      1. Wow. Amazing answer, El Rubio.

        My parents once told me that I couldn’t grow my hair out or get tattoos while they paid my bills… which seemed perfectly fair, so I waited patiently. As soon as I was self-sufficient (midway through university), I started growing my hair out. When I graduated and started up my business, I started getting tattoos.

        As I grew my hair out, they complained. As I told them about my tattoo plans, they also complained. But I’d followed their rules, and I was upfront with them about my plans. While I wasn’t going along with their preferences, I wasn’t doing anything dishonest or immoral, and they realized that.

        Ten years later my business is great, I’m married, we’re working on buying a second house, and our first kid is on the way. My parents now tell me that I should wear my hair down more often (instead of in a highball), and they love the tattoos I wound up choosing.

        If you prove yourself responsible, I suspect your parents will come around 🙂

  19. A bald man once asked me, “When are you gonna cut your hair so you’ll look like a normal person?”
    I told him, “when I have enough to donate to you”.

    1. There’s also: If a bald person asks you when you’re going to cut your hair so you look like a normal person, you can say “when are you going to grow hair so you look like a normal person”.

  20. At this point in my life (I’m 52), I really have to hold my tongue because the first response is (insert profanity).
    Oops… Work is the hardest part, I need the job man… LOL
    I’m past my shoulders now, can’t wait to try all the great tips in the comming weeks!


  21. When someone tries to say long hair is for girls only and that I ought to cut it, I simply ask them who the most mighty warriors in Ancient Greece were. Their answer (if they’re at all educated) is of course Sparta. Then I ask them what the Persian scout reported back to his leader when the Persians were trying to invade Greece. But Most of the time they don’t know the answer, which is that the Spartans were known to have long hair, and while waiting for the Persian army to arrive, the 12 (or so) guys who actually held them off for a long while were just combing their hair and relaxing.

    I really hate that men with long hair is considered weird now. Back in the past only the people fortunate enough to not have to do field work grew their hair out. And often warriors grew it out, such as the mighty Vikings. So there really is nothing incredibly Feminine about it.

    1. There’s quite a lot of sexual dimorphism between men and women, with the masculinizing traits being broader shoulders, narrower hips, more muscle mass, less fat, more body hair, proportionally bigger upper bodies, greater grip strength, and so on. Hair length has nothing to do with any of that. In fact, long hair is a sign of health and fitness in both men and women.

      So I’m with ya, man. Long hair is culturally more common in women nowadays, but that’s just the current trend.

  22. Also for some reason long hair gets called “gay” a lot when like 99% of gay people I’ve met have short hair. Furthermore if being “manly” really concerns you, look to all the great heroes and warriors throughout history. Chances are they had long hair….

  23. I just sniff once and say, “I’m getting the band back together, man”.

  24. I’ve honestly gotten more positive comments on my long hair and it looking good on me than I have snarky comments about being a guy with long hair. Of course, being a 6ft 8in tall, 320lb biker MIGHT have something to do with that latter part.

    1. I started growing my hair at 6’2 and 130 pounds, with everyone and their grandmother calling me a girl, gay (and the pejorative term), telling me to get a haircut, and so on. I started lifting weights, got some tattoos, gained 55 pounds, and all the insults turned into compliments: you’ve got better hair than me, I’m jealous, amazing mane, and so on.

      I think you’re right. The bigger and more badass you look, the more compliments and fewer insults you get.

      So my #1 hater-avoidance tip would be to get strong.

    2. SAY AT LEAST I DONT LOOK LIKE YOU WITH YO UGLY LOOKING SELF (just kidding don’t say that, dont fight rude comments with rude comments)

  25. ive heard that allot from some people lol but i usually reply with a no or just ignore them xD .by my thoughts long hair represents freedom from the stereotypical society . we are free , we are the long hairs !

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