A Dude’s Guide to Emotional IQ

The Subtle Art of Being a Good Dude, Part 2
This is the second installment in a series covering several tenets of masculinity and manhood. Our second topic is emotional IQ.
October 26, 2023
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Calm Like a Bomb

“I’M GOING TO F*CKING SNAP.” Many of us have had this internal dialogue. Probably more than once. The human condition is an imperfect one. Try as we might, sometimes our environment or our circumstances get the best of us. Any guy that has ever lost control knows just how rotten it feels when you finally calm down. Enter emotional IQ, a man’s best friend in times of inner struggle.
A lizard, a literal lizard, who you know just by looking at 'em he lacks personal integrity.

What is Emotional IQ For Men?

High emotional IQ is commonly described as the ability to understand and manage one’s own emotions. Someone that is overly argumentative, or is prone to things like outbursts could be considered low in emotional IQ.
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It Never Pays to be a Prick

Though it might seem like it in the moment, losing control of our emotions and lashing out never makes the situation better. Our problem—be it bills, a pesky neighbor, the FRICKIN PADRES blew it again, or something more serious, like marital issues—isn’t going to go away because we lost our cool.

Think of your internal emotions like trench warfare. Every time you lose control, you dig your trench a little deeper. It might seem like you’re getting what you want initially, but eventually you’ve dug so deep that you’ve lost sight of the battle.

Sometimes what a man escapes to is worse than what he escapes from.
-Stan Lynde
El Rubio and El Moreno, men who know Masculinity Demands Personal Integrity

Cool as a Cucumber

Whatever you have going on, you don’t have to figure it out all at once. Take a tactical time-out and assess your situation. Think of the version of you that isn’t overwhelmed, or pissed off, or scared…and ask yourself what that guy would do in this situation. Take a moment to reflect, then address the issue at hand.

As we pointed out in The Subtle Art of Being a Good Dude, Part 1, nobody expects anybody to be perfect. You’re human and you deserve some freakin leeway. The first person that needs to give you that support, however, is you. You have all the power to stay in control and to effectively communicate with your head and your heart working in unison.

To inspire confidence, develop masculinity and foster community among guys growing their hair.
-The Longhairs’ core vision
As we are constantly striving to be the best possible men for our communities, we’re proud as hell that you’re here with us, and we hope being the best version of yourself is on your agenda too.

How do you keep the lion in the cage?

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